New Blog

 Just for fun and something different for me to play with.

The Revolting Peasant

I Almost Became A Tranny

Well, I guess a more accurate description would be a eunuch, since I wouldn't be cross-dressing or asking people to use made up stupid pronouns.

I went on an ambulance call yesterday at one of our apartment complexes. When I knocked on the door, the door wasn't latched and swung open a few inches. Much to my surprise, a large pit bull shoved it's head through the opening right at and against my groin. I was not injured, but I used my best Drill Sargent voice and commanded the occupants to "CONTROL YOUR DOG!" They weren't too happy to be yelled at about their supposedly "friendly" dog, as I was axed "Why you gotta be like dat?" as they pulled it backwards into the apartment and closed the door. The person we were there to see opened the door and squeezed out through the opening so the dog wouldn't get out and the rest of the call was a routine transport.

I documented all this in my Patient Care Report, and then had a phone conversation with the Chief so he was aware. We both agreed that if that had been a state trooper that came to the door first, the dog would have gotten a lead pill in the noggin, no ifs, ands, or buts. They should be happy they just got told in a loud voice to control their dog.

I wouldn't Put It Past Them (snerk alert)

The Brandon Administration acquires vintage WWII era German box car for reverse engineering.

 

In order to have an accurate type of transportation system for moving political opponents to prison camps, The Brandon Administration has acquired an authentic Deutsche Reichbahn G10 type boxcar. 200,000 copies will be constructed using the $400B originally earmarked for student loan forgiveness but sidelined by SCOTUS. The cars will be constructed with the insides smeared with human waste, and pulled only by steam engines utilizing the hideous sounding high-pitch European whistle for authenticity.

In related news, DHS, ATF, IRS, FBI, and all other armed alphabet regulatory agencies will begin learning to speak German so that the shouted commands for moving political prisoners on and off the rail cars sound more angry and authoritative. Federal personnel will be armed with Mauser 98k rifles, Schmeisser MP-44's, and Luger pistols. See the new federal uniform styles below. All federal canines will be transitioned to German Shepherds that only respond to German commands.

 

 

This was my own parody "news" story. The photo came from an email announcement I received from The American Heritage Museum. The actual official announcement from the museum with the photo can be found at this link. I have been to this museum in Hudson, MA and it is pretty cool. It's even better if you attend on Columbus Day weekend for the "Battle For The Airfield" WWII re-enactment.

A Couple Of Items

Monday I was out on "The Beast" to run an errand and then help out a friend with his Goldwing. It was a warm and partly sunny midday, with thunderstorms in the evening well after I got safely home. My riding bud has been laid up since winter, and is no closer to riding after stints in the hospital and rehab facilities. I don't think he will ever be able to ride on two wheels again, so I went over to dust off, start, and take his 2015 Goldwing out for a short run. It already had and still had a full tank of fuel when I got back. He came out in the blazing heat with his walker and sat on his bike side-saddle, and then barely made it back into the house without collapsing. I thought his girlfriend was gonna kill him for that. I let his bike cool down and hooked up his battery charger and put the cover on. On the way home I had a revelation. I stream iHeart Radio on my cell phone, connected to my bike via a Bluetooth adapter. I happened to be streaming the iHeart 70's channel and something felt really familiar. Not deja vu but just very familiar. OF COURSE.... I KNOW WHAT IT IS!!

The earlier model Archer Road Patrol Bike Radio I had

I got one of these for maybe my 11th birthday. My siblings had later received the newer round red model. They were AM only, mounted to the handlebars of your bike, and had an electronic horn. There was a large round yellow reflector on the other side. We spent all summer riding our bikes from just after breakfast until dark every single day it wasn't raining. All of us had our bike radios tuned to WDRC AM-1360 in Hartford listening to the pop hits of the day, and what they play on iHeart 70's is exactly what they used to play on WDRC. Just before the WDRC noon news break every day, the DJ (I believe it was Ted Dalaku) would say the day's "sandwich of the day" (which was usually a gross combination of foods and toppings) and then loudly proclaim, "It's LUUUUUUUUNCH TIME!!!" followed by the news jingle and noon news with Walt Dibble. After the noon news it was music with commercial breaks until late afternoon drive time when news and traffic would be at the top and bottom of the hour in between music. While I was heading home on my motorcycle Monday listening to my streaming tunes, I was mentally transported back to summer vacation 1974 as a 12 year old kid riding my bicycle. Oh if only I could have 3 months off every summer to do nothing but have fun like a kid again with no worries or cares as an adult.

Today would have been Cassidy Wofford's 35th birthday. Who is she you ask? She was a PT I once transported that attempted to commit suicide by lying down in the middle of a dark back country road. Luckily an alert motorist spotted her and called 911. I won't go into any more detail, but she is the primary reason I do not like what I call the "sad little girl call." To me the "sad little girl" is 13-22 years old, depressed, suicidal, crying her eyes out, most likely abused, a cutter, and I am probably meeting her because of a suicide attempt and a law enforcement 72 hour psychiatric hold in the ER. While there have been many others, she is the one that I probably should have sought counseling for, it was that upsetting. I am much better on these calls now, even though I still would rather drive the boo-boo bus and let someone else tech the call.

Cassidy during one of her few happier times.

Cassidy had moved out of state; to Kentucky I believe, and finally, sadly committed suicide on May 28, 2011. At 35 she would have been only 3 years younger than my own daughter. I think about her on both days; her birthday and death day. 

Happy Birthday in Heaven, Little One. You are not forgotten and although you never knew it, you touched someone that really did care for you.

Uh... You Dropped Something There, Hunter

 Cocaine found at the White House in the West Wing by Secret Service.

That's not mine, dude.... I swear